"Why is it that pastors are so passionate about small groups yet are rarely in one themselves?"
It's a fair question.
A spiritual leader I know once referenced small groups as the 'speed dating' of friendship. A place where people get together, talk about their daddy wounds with folks they've never met. Small groups usually start out great, but then they begin to lose their energy after a month or two and the group divides into two camps: one group of people who are the committed types would go to a root canal every week if they had promised to. The other group are those who happen to find something else to do, are sick, had a root canal to go to instead of going to the boring small group. Those who left feel guilty. Those who stay judge those who left.
It's beautiful, really.
That's why I'm calling an end to small groups and crying out for a shift towards friendship. Healthy people don't need small groups- they need to bring people into their social network. People don't need groups, they need friends. Somehow the whole world has survived without the strange concoction of the 'small group' that churches readily and sincerely embraced in the 90s.
I almost never talk about small groups at Mosaic. I almost always talk about getting around some good people that can bring out the best in you- people you can partner with and do something meaningful with your lives.
In other words: get some friends and get a life.
I wonder if we put the Prius in front of the lithium battery on this one and just try to get everyone into our pre-programmed infrastructure, rather than creating a value for healthy friendship- something that is difficult [impossible?] to achieve without the active presence of God among us.
Comments (3)
Arent small groups designed to allow a church to get "smaller" while the church as a whole is getting "bigger"
what I mean is... as the church grows and expands and more people start coming its harder for those who have been there a while to get deeper in the word and messages.
The :"small group" is just a title. Its really is a group of friends who meet together for fellowship sometimes, diving deeper into the word of God other times.
Pastor Mike actually is IN OUR small group so I would have to refute the comment that pastors arent in ones themselves.
Now me personally,,,,, I could go either way on the small group. However, I have seen my wife grow in her faith from it, another girl in our group get healed from a brain swelling situation, my brother in law and new christian grow leaps and bounds in his faith and leadership skills. A direct quote from my brother in law and the facilitator of our small group " I have never gone out and made a freind on purpose, so to do that with people whom share a common belief in Christ like I do has truly blessed me"
I would say it is a very healthy avenue for people to work on their relationship with Christ and getting closer to Him.
guess that discussion was short and sweet huh
I hear you KG. That is a powerful testimony about your brother in law and a good example of the best of small groups. I think the point of the article I agree with is that the experience of deep, meaningful relationships should be a part of the culture and not just a program. Like many things in life the answer is probably "both - and"-- both a culture that values relationships and programs that are used as tools to foster them.
Happy fourth of July.